| No Images? Click here   Divorces on TV and in the movies seem so black and white; there’s some arguing, maybe an affair is exposed, one person yells, “I want a divorce!” and off to divorce court they go. The reality is a lot more nuanced; marriages break down over years — sometimes decades — before one or both partners realize that the relationship is unsalvageable.Just as lovebirds describe a moment they knew they had found “the one,” there is often a single moment divorcés can pinpoint when they knew their marriages were over. This week, we asked men to disclose the moment they knew that divorce was inevitable. In one poignant anecdote, a man named Bill describes hearing the words “I hate you” from his wife in the midst of an argument and knowing that she meant it. “There is no coming back from that four-letter word,” he said. Read the rest here.Xo, Ashley Rockman In case you missed it
 Ask an expertA reader writes, “A dear friend of mine was dumped rather suddenly by her long-term boyfriend last year. After it happened, understandably, it's all she could think and talk about, and as her close friend, I was there to listen and support her. But six months later, the vast majority of our conversations revolve around her ex and the other men she's been seeing. Mutual friends of ours have taken note of this as well. One told me she realized she hadn't even shared some of the important things going on in her own life because she can't seem to get a word in edgewise when they're together. What's the best way to handle this situation? Is there a nice way to bring this up, while still being supportive?”Washington DC-based psychotherapist Elisabeth J. LaMotte, founder of the DC Counseling and Psychotherapy Center, is here to answer this week’s question. Here’s what she had to say:“One-sided conversations can feel disappointing, especially if they become the norm with a dear friend who, I presume, used to engage in more balanced communications. It sounds like the sudden breakup has been so traumatic that it has damaged your friend’s sense of who she is and how to function as a separate, individual self. Rejection is incredibly painful, but breakups can be wonderful opportunities for growth and reflection. If your friend is alienating her friends by over-focusing on her ex and her current dates, an unfortunate added layer is that she is probably equally undefined during her dating experiences. This probably compromises her ability to choose a suitable partner. But that will be up to her to figure out, and there are limits to the amount of help and guidance a friend can give.If you happen to have personal life or dating experience that connects to this topic, it could be worth folding that into your attempt to create a shift in the conversation. Your instincts are right on target: the key is to be ‘nice’ and ‘supportive’ as you describe above. In other words, you can get away with saying anything to anyone if you are kind and simultaneously consider their emotional ego. Try saying something like this:‘I’ve always enjoyed our talks and our time together. And I wish you had not been through this difficult breakup, although I must admit I think you are better off without what’s his name. I value our friendship and so I have something I want to share. I notice that in my own romantic life, my relationships with guys and with friends feel more satisfying when I make dating less of an overall focus and instead prioritize ways to make my independent life interesting and full. We used to talk more along these lines – about what we like to do, about our views of current events, about where we plan to travel. I miss those conversations and wonder if we can try to get back to that. Do you think we could give that a try?’”If you have a relationship question that you would like answered in a newsletter, please e-mail it to us at relationships@huffpost.com.
#TBT  It’s often assumed that people with disabilities don’t have a desire for sex or the physical ability to have sex to begin with. That’s a misconception. We asked disability advocates to share some of the worst things they’ve heard while dating, and their answers may shock you. Links we love: 
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