No Images? Click here It’s true that in some cases, opposites attract — but people tend to assume that couples with differing lifestyles and viewpoints don’t have what it takes to sustain a long-lasting relationship. That’s a misconception.“Expecting our life partners or spouses to be and think just like us can often lead to a sense of disappointment or failure once we actually find out that our partners think, act and react differently than us,” sex therapist Douglas C. Brooks told HuffPost. “Many couples who believe they share so much in common often become bored in the relationship.”It’s important to see eye to eye in certain important areas, like your feelings about monogamy and having kids, for example. But relationship experts say that there are plenty of qualities and interests that people don’t need to share with their life partner, and that those differences can contribute to an exciting and happy relationship.Find out 8 things you don’t need to have in common with your partner. Do any sound familiar?Xo, Ashley Rockman (follow me on Instagram!)In case you missed it
Ask an expertA reader writes, “I'm pretty active on social media and love posting photos of me and my long-term boyfriend on Instagram and Facebook. He's also pretty active on social media, but doesn't post pictures of the two of us very often. I wish he would post about us more, but is that unreasonable?”Washington DC-based psychotherapist Elisabeth J. LaMotte, founder of the DC Counseling and Psychotherapy Center, is here to answer this week’s question. Here’s what she had to say:“It is entirely reasonable to wish that your boyfriend shared more of your love life on social media. Since you seem to enjoy celebrating your relationship and experiences with him and sharing these feelings with others by including him in your feeds, it would be a nice balance if he did the same. Have the two of you discussed this?Keep in mind that some people keep their posts much less personal despite frequently sharing geographic locations, news articles, memes, viewpoints or even photographs of their latest meal. If that’s how he rolls, it is understandable to wish this were different, but it is also worth respecting his perspective. If, however, he is routinely grouping friends together and asking you to shoot the photos he posts of him with his buddies, then his reluctance to include you in his posts may carry more meaning.Approach the topic with curiosity rather than criticism by saying something like this:'It makes me feel good to share some of our experiences as a couple with our friends. That’s part of how I celebrate our relationship. I notice that I include you in my posts more than you include me and I don’t want to read too much into it, but I would like to understand why that is. It would mean a lot to me if you shared photos of the two of us a bit more often. How would you feel about this?'What matters most is the experience of your relationship away from the screens, so keep an open mind as you discuss your feelings and learn more about his perspective. We often fall in love with people because we are drawn to their differences. Most of us do not want to be romantic with a replica of ourselves. Nevertheless, once we are intimate, it is very common to try to convince our partner to be more like us. And that’s too bad because, deep down, we all want to be loved and respected for who we are.”If you have a relationship question that you would like answered in this newsletter, please e-mail it to us at relationships@huffpost.com.#TBT With all the excitement leading up to Prince Harry and Meghan Markle’s royal wedding on May 19, we’re throwing it back to Queen Elizabeth and Prince Philip’s nuptials. The November 20, 1947 event was greatly anticipated in Great Britain after years of austerity during World War II. Fans of “The Crown” will also appreciate this photo roundup.Links we love: HuffPost is now a part of Oath and a part of Verizon. On May 25th 2018 we will be introducing a new Oath Privacy Policy which will explain how your data is used and shared. Learn More.No moon dust. No B.S. Just a completely essential daily guide to achieving the good life. Subscribe here. Like what you see? Share it.Can't get enough? You'll also love HuffPost's Entertainment newsletter.©2018 HuffPost | 770 Broadway, New York, NY 10003 |
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